Out of the Valley: You're Not Alone

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

You're Not Alone

I found this morning's wake up song was a nice follow up to my post about the dream sequence. There are days when I feel so alone, even if I am with people. And then other days, even if I am physically alone where I know Jim is close.

I used to, and even sometimes still do, feel that way about my grandmothers, both of whom died before I was a teenager. Yet to this day, when I call out, they are close, and watching over me.

We all have someone in our heart that we can reach out to in times of need... Some call on a guardian angel, some call on God, some call on a dearly departed others call a friend. I am blessed to have all of those options.

We all have our days
When nothing goes as planned
Not a soul in the world
Seems to understand
And for someone to talk to
You'd give anything
Well go on and cry out loud
'Cause someone's listenin'

Call it an angel
Call it a muse
And call it karma that you've got comin' to you
What's the difference
What's in name
What matters most is never ever losin' faith
'Cause it's gonna be alright
You're not alone tonight

Writer: Keith Lionel Urban
Copyright: Guitar Monkey Music, Songs Of Universal Inc

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About this blog

On May 3, 2013, a bronchoscopy confirmed my husband, Jim McConnell, who would turn 53 two days later, had stage IV cancer. He fought valiantly, never ever giving up hope, always with a sense of humor. We had shirts made for all of us that read: Cancer Sucks: Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the toughest SOB in the valley. An incredibly short journey of nine months later, I had the joy and sadness of saying good morning to my husband Jim for the very last time. After going through initial stages we all go through, the shock, the numbness, the disconnect I realized I was on a new journey. It was no longer our journey, it was mine alone. I traveled with him into the valley of the shadow of death, but he had to go on alone Where he had to step, it is not yet my time. In the beginning of my solo journey, I pictured myself at the bottom of the Grand Canyon, a beautiful spot, and indeed, my life with Jim, despite his cancer, had been a beautiful life. We were blessed in so many ways. Yet in those long months after his death, I felt I was at the bottom of a very deep, dark, primeval place, my own Phantom Ranch, and I needed all my strength to climb out. I am getting stronger, and now, it’s my turn to take a step on my own, to somehow figure out how to climb out of the valley.